On 'Gay Marriage'.

22nd August 2015.

One of the things that troubles me about 'gay marriage' (OK - it's just 'marriage' but you know what I mean), is that whilst it gives public recognition to two women or men making a lifelong commitment to each other, it doesn't give an equal space for the recognition of other relationship choices.

So ... to counter that, I've decided I'm ready to take that big step ... I'm announcing my commitment to a lifelong pursuit of social and sexual relationship with a variety of different men (known and as yet unknown) as long we all shall manage it.

I shall be expecting generous presents and I'll be holding a ten-day incredibly unaffordable ‘wedding’ party in an obscure and distant location (to be announced). The wedding list is at John Lewis ... or Lidl, depending on your budget ...

23rd August 2015.

So ... arrangements for the ceremony are underfoot (that's a mixture of 'underway' and 'afoot'). There will be 10 to 12 'grooms' (a couple are undecided yet - they're not sure if the whole idea stinks of irremediable bourgeois decadence).

There's a bit of a problem with the whole 'gay wedding' title though ... some of the guys don't identify as gay and some don't identify as 'guys'. Everyone likes the title 'groom' though as it reminds us all of monkeys and their friendly social grooming habits. (Although, thinking about it, perhaps it should be 'groomer'... )

We're throwing around a few terms ... 'Bent Unbinding Ceremony', 'Bum Bandits Bumper Jamboree' ... (we all like the alliteration, but we're not sure if it really is as inclusive as it sounds at first).

Hmmm ... being non-mainstream can be so DEMANDING at times ...